What Not to Say in an Exit Interview and What to Say Instead

An exit interview is a meeting between a departing employee and a representative from the company, usually from human resources. Its purpose is for the organization to gather feedback to understand reasons for turnover and identify areas for improvement. For the person leaving, the goal is to provide constructive input while ensuring a professional departure that keeps future networking opportunities open.

Avoid Personal Complaints and Blame

When participating in an exit interview, it is tempting to air frustrations about specific individuals, but this is unprofessional and can jeopardize future references. Instead of focusing on a person’s perceived failings, concentrate on behaviors and their impact on your work. For example, rather than stating, “My boss was a terrible micromanager,” you could offer, “I believe I would have been more effective with greater autonomy on my projects.”

This shifts the focus from a personal attack to a discussion about management styles. Similarly, avoid blaming coworkers for team-related issues. A statement like, “My teammates were lazy,” is accusatory and subjective.

A more professional approach is to say, “The distribution of workload on team projects felt unbalanced, which occasionally impacted our deadlines.” This feedback points to a systemic problem with project management or role clarity. This method ensures your feedback is perceived as objective and allows HR to identify patterns that may need addressing.

Keep Your Future Plans Private

As you discuss your departure, you will likely be asked about your next steps. It is advisable to keep the specific details of your new position private, as sharing your new employer or salary serves no constructive purpose. Revealing such information can be perceived as boastful, and you are under no obligation to disclose the particulars.

If asked directly about where you are going, have a polite and brief response ready. You could say, “I’m excited about the new opportunity, but I’m not ready to share those details just yet.” Another option is, “I’m still finalizing the details and would prefer to keep them private for now.”

Do Not Get Overly Emotional

An exit interview is a business meeting, so it is important to manage your emotions. While your feelings about leaving are valid, expressing them through anger or tears can detract from the credibility of your feedback. When emotions run high, the substance of your message can get lost, and an interviewer might dismiss your points as the product of distress rather than objective observation.

To prepare, take time before the meeting to reflect on your experiences and organize your thoughts. Focusing on specific examples and their business impact, rather than on your personal feelings, can help you remain objective and professional.

Withhold Previously Unmentioned Grievances

The exit interview is not the proper forum to disclose a serious issue for the first time. Matters such as harassment, discrimination, or safety violations should be reported through the company’s official channels as soon as they occur. Raising such a complaint only as you are leaving can undermine its credibility.

When a major grievance is aired for the first time during an exit interview, it leads the interviewer to question why it was not addressed earlier, making it seem like a parting shot. This principle does not apply to general feedback or suggestions for operational improvements, which are the intended focus of an exit interview.

If you find yourself in a situation where you did not report a serious issue, you may need to seek legal advice or contact the appropriate external regulatory agencies. Using the exit interview to discuss systemic process flaws is appropriate; using it to lodge a formal complaint for the first time is not.

Refrain from Being Dishonest or Overly Positive

While it is important to avoid excessive negativity, it is equally unhelpful to be dishonest or offer vague, overly positive feedback. Falsely claiming you are leaving for personal reasons when you are actually dissatisfied robs the company of an opportunity to address real problems. Similarly, providing non-specific praise that everything was “great” is not useful.

The purpose of the interview is to gather honest insights that can lead to positive change. You can be honest about challenges without being accusatory by mentioning a specific, systemic challenge and offering a suggestion.

What to Focus on Instead

To ensure your exit interview is productive, concentrate your feedback on constructive and actionable topics. Center your comments on systemic issues rather than on individuals, such as how the project approval process could be more streamlined.

Express gratitude for the specific opportunities and skills you gained during your tenure. Mentioning a training program you found valuable or a project that helped you grow leaves a positive final impression.

When stating your reasons for leaving, be clear and neutral. Frame your decision in terms of your own career path, such as, “I found an opportunity that better aligns with my long-term goals,” to provide a professional reason without assigning blame.