Bereavement leave is time taken off from work to cope with the death of a loved one. This period allows individuals to manage personal affairs and begin the grieving process without the immediate pressure of job responsibilities. The decision of when and how to use this leave requires understanding company policies, logistical considerations, and your own emotional needs.
Understanding Bereavement Leave Policies
You must first understand your employer’s specific policy, which is located in the employee handbook. These policies outline the core components of the leave, defining eligibility and duration. A detail is how many days are offered; most companies provide between three to five days for an immediate family member. Some policies may offer a shorter period, such as one day, for the death of an extended relative.
Another factor is whether the leave is paid or unpaid. Many employers offer some form of paid leave, but it’s not always for the full duration. For instance, a policy might grant five days off, with only three of those days being paid. Also check which relationships qualify for leave. Policies will list covered family members, which include a spouse, domestic partner, children, parents, and siblings, but may also extend to grandparents, in-laws, or others with a close relationship.
There is no federal law in the United States that requires private companies to provide bereavement leave. However, a handful of states, including California, Illinois, Oregon, Maryland, and Washington, have enacted laws that mandate it. For example, in California, employers with five or more employees must provide up to five days of leave.
Deciding the Timing of Your Leave
Once you understand your company’s policy, you can decide on the best time to take your leave. Many people choose to begin their leave immediately after receiving the news of a death. This provides an initial period to process the loss and handle any urgent family matters without the distraction of work.
Alternatively, you may need to schedule your leave to coincide with specific events. If travel is required to be with family or to attend a funeral, align your days off with those dates. Memorial services sometimes take place weeks after a death, so you might delay your leave until that time.
Some company policies offer flexibility, allowing employees to split their bereavement leave. This can be useful if you have immediate responsibilities to attend to, followed by a memorial service at a later date. For instance, you could take two days off immediately and save the remaining days for the funeral. Confirm with your manager or HR department if this is a permissible option.
How to Formally Request Bereavement Leave
When you are ready to take leave, you must formally notify your employer. The first step is to inform your direct manager as soon as possible, as they will need to arrange for your absence. A follow-up communication with the Human Resources department may also be necessary to handle the official request and documentation.
A phone call is often the most immediate way to convey the news, but it should be followed by a written request via email. This creates a formal record of your leave request. Your email should be professional and concise, containing only the necessary information and not extensive personal details about the circumstances of the death.
Your email should state that you are requesting bereavement leave, specify your relationship to the deceased, and the dates you anticipate being away from work. For example: “I am writing to request bereavement leave following the death of my [relationship], [Name]. I would like to take [number] days of leave, from [start date] to [end date].” Your employer may require documentation, such as a copy of the death certificate or an obituary, so be prepared to provide this if asked.
What to Do If Your Company Lacks a Policy
If your employer lacks a formal, written bereavement leave policy, you still have options for taking time off. The first step should be to have a direct conversation with your manager or an HR representative. Smaller companies or startups may handle such situations on a case-by-case basis and might be willing to grant informal leave.
In the absence of a specific bereavement policy, you can often use other forms of paid time off. Check your available balance for vacation days, personal days, or sick leave. Maryland’s Flexible Leave Act, for example, requires employers with 15 or more employees to allow the use of paid sick leave for bereavement.
For longer-term needs, the Family and Medical Leave Act (FMLA) could be a possibility. FMLA provides unpaid, job-protected leave for qualifying family and medical reasons. While it does not cover bereavement directly, it can apply if the employee’s mental health is significantly impacted by the loss, requiring treatment, or if the leave was initially taken to care for the family member before they passed away.
Recognizing Your Personal Need for Time Off
Beyond the logistics of attending services and managing affairs, acknowledge your own emotional and psychological needs. Grief affects everyone differently, and the impact can interfere with your ability to function at work. An inability to concentrate or focus on tasks is a common indicator that you may not be ready to return to your work responsibilities.
Overwhelming feelings of sadness, stress, or anxiety are natural responses to loss, but when they feel unmanageable, taking time off can be a necessary step toward healing. These emotional states can make it difficult to engage with colleagues and meet professional expectations.
Grief can also manifest in physical symptoms, such as fatigue, changes in sleep patterns, or a weakened immune system. Ignoring these physical signs can prolong your recovery. Using bereavement leave is not just for handling external responsibilities; it is also for resting and allowing your mind and body to begin to heal.